The Journey Towards Authenticity

It’s not easy, this journey we call life. The search to follow your own path, despite others expectactions, is difficult. Some of us feel called to more. To a different path. One that we create ourselves. The journey towards authenticity is uniquely our own.

Sure its harder and its longer. There are much easier ways to get there. But, we are driven to choose the harder path. 

Of course, there are people that have gone before us who have started the journey. We can jump in where they have already created the path. We can add to their path and make it clearer for those who follow behind us. It still isn’t the most traveled path, but it is getting more use now. 

My Journey

In my own life, I have never been one to follow the usual path. I was born a girl. A very strong-willed headstrong girl. A very strong-willed, headstrong, Daddy’s girl. Who decided she would be more like her Daddy. I followed my Dad around like a little puppy dog, doing what he did. “Helping” him do what he was doing. 

Best of all, we played baseball. A lot. He taught us how to hit and catch. We played in the back yard as many nights as he could. I played then with the neighbor kids as much as we could. Then, when I was old enough, my sister and I, played baseball with the rec dept. 

They didn’t want us to play, its a boys league, my Mother was told. My Mother said she wanted us to play with them, we- my sister and I- wanted to play. After some discussion, we ended up playing with them. 

Baseball is part of my journey

Some of the coaches weren’t very happy with that and they let us know. I didn’t care, I wanted to play baseball. So I did the best I could and did my best to prove to them that I could play just as well as the boys. I even dressed like the boys. We played with that league for several years and then finally, there was a girls softball league. I think I was in middle school. My Mom signed me up to play with them. I didn’t want to play softball. Softball was for girls. My Mom told me to try it so I went to the first couple of practices. 

I was so disgusted with these girls who didn’t even know how to catch a ball, I left the team and didn’t go back. Looking back, they probably would have liked for me to stay on the team if only to help teach these girls how to play the game properly. And, it may have been good for me to keep my head in the game instead of where it went soon after that. But I refused to go and its done now. 

Is there a Normal Journey?

All of that to tell you that my journey towards authenticity, has not been the normal journey. I understand now that many people follow a kind of unspoken checklist of milestones. They will chose the sport or activity that their parents choose, or they choose to do. They will go to a proper public or private school. They will go to college for the degree their parents have chose for them or they choose. Somewhere in there, they will find their true love and, after completing college, get married. In the plan, they will work in their career field a few years and then have 2, maybe 3 children. Then live happily ever after. 

In my journey, I finished high school and had a boyfriend. I started college, for what I didn’t know. It was in the rule book, right?? I almost made it a whole semester and then, chose the boyfriend over college. I got pregnant, broke up with the boyfriend and had the most beautiful little boy. Soon after he was born, I met my husband, got married and had 8 more children. Definitely not the norm. 3 of them were born at home. And we homeschooled most of them throughout their school careers. I am a stay at home mom. 

Worse yet, my husband chose his own path and, after many years of hard work, became his own boss. 

Roles to play in the journey

Along the way, in my journey to authenticity, I tried to fit into the roles assigned to me in the various stages of my life. I don’t really fit in any of them in the “traditional” or “generic” sense. At least, I never felt that way.  

I am now 53 years old. (I don’t feel that old other than when my body decides its gonna be old. In my mind, I’m still a kid. I am a grandma for goodness sake…) Finally I have figured out, and come to the understanding that I am who I am and its good. In fact, its very good, according to God. 

I don’t fit the narrative or follow the rules. Stepping out of line is what I do. Choosing my own path according to the direction God calls me to go is what I do. 

I am proud to be a former homeschool mom. Recovering drill sergeant. Wife, mother and now Grandma. Daughter, sister, sister in law. Friend. Woman of God. I have followed my own path to finding my authentic self. 

I am ME and its very good. 

How can I help you on your own journey towards authenticity? Message me or contact me today!

Blessings,

Vicki